Compassion, goals and building a practice

These are some short thought on how we, when we set new goals for ourselves in our lives (think new years promises and "I'm gonna change my life for the better"), sometimes feel like we end up failing. So read on if you wish.

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We often set ourselves up for failure by wanting to do too much at a time. We feel like our lives are a drag and so we decide to start meditating daily, doing our devotions daily, pray, go to the gym X times per week, eat healthy, sleep enough, write in our Book of Shadows, or a myriad of other things at the same time. We want change and we want it now.

In September I set a goal for myself to read one book each month. By December I felt as though I had failed. But I did not have a routine in reading. Since then reading has become a little easier because even though I have not realized it, I have been getting a routine. But it has built slowly, little, by little.

Those can all be good goals, but if we lack a previous routine doing them, we are setting ourselves up for failure very effectively, because good and healthy habits take time and dedication to build. It can be your end goal to live like this list you have set up, and if that is so, then good. But start small, with one thing, and slowly change your routine to incorporate this and the other things into your life. And as your life changes, adjust your new routines to suit it. Your goals might even change, and that is okay.

As with learning sports, knitting, playing the piano, or developing any other skill set, we need to give ourselves time and be persistent in learning and getting used to, eg. meditation or going to the gym. We need to allow ourselves to not always succeed, and to recognize that sometimes we simply do not have the time and energy. But if we persistently try we can build new habits to replace the ones we do not like. With time and patience. 

Sometimes it feels like we are getting nowhere with our goals. But as easy it would be to just give up as we feel the path takes us nowhere, it might be good to know that even the smallest steps take us closer to reaching our goal.
Pic from Salamajärvi National Park, Finland, August 2018

The same goes for building your daily Wiccan or magical practice. Above all: Remember to be compassionate with yourself. Be kind and do not demand too much at once. Sometimes life is hard and takes time, and then you just need to be even kinder to yourself at those times.

Love and compassion, not just for others, but for yourself as well. 

Blessed be!
~Stella